There was this man Ah Liang who brought to jail because he smuggled heroine, cigarette through the causeways .The day he was caught. It was cold, raining when he was caught He was caught at orchard road; A plain cloth policeman nabbed him down.
He didn’t struggle. He did a mistakes and this wasn’t his first time doing such things. He lived a frugal and time wasting life. He used to be a taxi driver, but he found the income generated wasn’t fast enough for him. His wife wouldn’t yell at him that it is not enough. Years later, his wife left him. Thus that started his whole life came crashing down. He lost his family, and his wife asked for a divorce while she was pregnant with a baby boy.
Divorce was harsh for him. But been poor was unbearable .Thus, he wanted fast cash. He decided to do it the easy way out smuggling things, drugs was part of them. He sold them to ah pek and uncles who wanted to get cheap cigarettes .They would said ,”Go down to Hougang 25 S11 store, look for Ah Liang who usually drink Gunnies Stout or Tiger beers ,flirting with china beer lady who were here for their studying children ( taking some English course ) or married to Singapore Ah pek , found that he couldn’t afford to feed her .Ended up to be a beer lady. Ah Liang would flirt around with them, open several bottles. And Ah Pek would come to him for non taxed cigarattes.He would go to downtown pubs like Bangkok disco pub to get rid of his drugs. It was fast and easy cash for it.
When the time, he was sentenced to death sentence. He wasn’t rich enough to look for any lawyers .Thus he was sentenced. He remembers he had a son. His wife was in bad relationship with him and didn’t let his son know his existence. So he decided to write to his teenage son.
Dear Xiong,
I guess I am the father whom your mum didn’t tell you. I had been busying working hard all these years. I had saved up a lot for your varsity education. As I never made it to my O levels, I realized looking for a job is not easy for me. I am working in Malaysia, I do come home once a while .You could reply the letter to the address below.
Liang asked his good friend Siwei to bring those letters to him .As He asked his son to post all letter to Siwei’s house.
The letter was posted by the prison warden .But no replies was given .Toward a man waiting for death sentence. It is a long wait.
He wrote 2nd letter. He really hopes to see his son.
Dear Xiong ,
I wrote to you ,but you didn’t reply . Is u busy at school? Dad as usual been having classes here. Had you and mum living well? Do write back asp .
Again there were no replies for half a year .
.
This time ,he visited Liang with a reply letter.
Dear Papa,
I never expected to find out my dad at this age . I was teased in school , people said I don’t have a daddy. I asked mum about you ,but not much was told to me . Yes , Daddy , I was busy with my PSLE , thus I never wrote back to you . Finally , my exam is over . I write to you . Dad thank you for working so hard for me . Mum and I had been fine. I will be migrating to Australia with mummy and new daddy soon.
Daniel
When Liang read the letter , he was filled with tears.
Tears flow down , he shouted at Sewed,” He is doing fine . Do you know my son named Daniel .He replied . He doing well and he will be migrating to Australia with his new family. Sewed , I am so happy to know that . I could go with peace now .
The fact wasn’t it was as Sewed wept as he walked out the visitation centre.
For months ,When there wasn’t any reply Siwei decided to investigated it .He went to the address where Liang had wrote to .He found that there are only old folks living there. The previous tenants which may be his wife had lost his son in car accident when he was 8 year old .Liang son died . His wife remarried and migrates to Australia .
When Siwei found out these, he was shocked. He wouldn’t know what to do
The fact was Siwei was the son of Liang who wrote that last letter to him . Maybe it is after all good to tell a lie to a man waiting for death sentence that his kids and wife are living happily .
Siwei become the man who didn’t tell the truth . But neither was I right or wrong to judge him.
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Long Time
It is a long time since I Step into a gym . So it is a long time since I watch a movie in a threate .
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
running away from issues.
I dreamt about I running away from home .
Running Away: If you dream of running away from home, you are trying to avoid an issue in your real life. Pretending it doesn't exist could make things worse ...
Running Away
If you dream of running away from home, you are trying to avoid an issue in your real life. Pretending it doesn't exist could make things worse - you will not solve problems until you face them head on. This dream also suggests that you are not taking or accepting responsibility for your actions. In cases where the dreamer's home life is very difficult, this dream can represent a straightforward wish to live in a happier place.
I think it draw me back ......running away from issues ..maybe I had been ....
Running Away: If you dream of running away from home, you are trying to avoid an issue in your real life. Pretending it doesn't exist could make things worse ...
Running Away
If you dream of running away from home, you are trying to avoid an issue in your real life. Pretending it doesn't exist could make things worse - you will not solve problems until you face them head on. This dream also suggests that you are not taking or accepting responsibility for your actions. In cases where the dreamer's home life is very difficult, this dream can represent a straightforward wish to live in a happier place.
I think it draw me back ......running away from issues ..maybe I had been ....
Monday, December 12, 2011
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Everything must go
The most difficult is life ..maybe is what u are facing right now .. This is what I learn from Everything must go . It is a movie with deep meaning .
A man trying very hard ..yet in the end ..nothing seem to work well .....
I think I got alot to learn from him and standing up from a fall is not easy .But I will overcome it ......
A man trying very hard ..yet in the end ..nothing seem to work well .....
I think I got alot to learn from him and standing up from a fall is not easy .But I will overcome it ......
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
the bright sunny day (2)
Fine clear days ....Good sunshine ..
But .... Lately I am greet by a sense of great darkness in my life , after watching 50/50 and then The beaver . I cant help feeling abit sharing thier same thoughts....feel for them .... And I got discourging email . maybe Yoda doesnt meant a thing ...I think he doesnt know how a depressed person feel . Just like in beaver .. Everybody know how to talk , but they know because they are not in the wrecked train ...
But something cheered me up . It was Willie . He tell me a different path of life .. maybe afterall it is okay to just let go ....Yah ......
after replying him , I played this song repeatedly in my ears .
.
RADIO hEAD - hIGH AND dRY .
two jumps and a week
I bet you think that's pretty clever, don't you boy
Flying on your motorcycle
Watching all the ground beneath you drop
Kill yourself for recognition
Kill yourself to never ever stop
You broke another mirror
You're turning into something you are not
Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry
Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry
Drying up in conversation
You will be the one who cannot talk
All your insides fall to pieces
You just sit there wishing you could still make love
They're the ones who'll hate you
When you think you've got the world all sussed out
They're the once who'll spit at you
You'll be the one screaming out
Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry
Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry
It's the best thing that you ever had,
The best thing you ever, ever had
It's the best thing that you ever had,
The best thing you have had is gone away
Sunday, December 4, 2011
really like the show The Beaver 2011 by Mel Gibson
I been watching the movie the Beaverhttp://www.imdb.com/title/tt1321860/
It make me related alot to my thinking and open the door to depression .
Yap . I know how he feels . But my depression is into his kind ,self destruct till one would cut off thier hand . I know it hurts when the whole world said ," He is mad ." He is clooney"
The sound track is nice . I like the quotes the :
Walter Black: People seem to love a train wreck when it's not happening to them.
Walter Black: Starting over isn't crazy. Crazy is being miserable and walking around half asleep, numb, day after day after day. Crazy is pretending to be happy. Pretending that the way things are is the way they have to be for the rest of your bleeding life.
\
Walter Black: We reach a point where, in order to go on, we have to wipe the slate clean. We start to see ourselves as a box that we're trapped inside and no matter how we try and escape, self help, therapy, drugs, we just sink further and further down. The only way to truly break out of the box is to get rid of it all together... I mean, you built it in the first place. If the people around you are breaking your spirit, who needs them? Your wife who pretends to love you, your son who can't even stand you. I mean, put them out of their misery. Starting over isn't crazy. Crazy is being miserable and walking around half asleep, numb, day after day after day. Crazy is pretending to be happy. Pretending that the way things are is the way they have to be for the rest of your bleeding life. All the potential, hope, all that joy, feeling, all that passion that life has sucked out of you. Reach out, grab a hold of it and snatch it back from that bloodsucking rabble.
I'm not okay, not at all, the truth is, I'm missing something. The thing I loved the most, the face I wish were in the front row right now, the brother I'll never get back. So what do I do with that? What do any of us do? Besides lie. This is what I believe, right now, in this auditorium, there is someone who is with you, someone who is willing to pick you up, dust you off, kiss you, forgive you, put up with you, wait for you, carry you, love you. So while everything may not be okay, one thing I know is true, you do not have to be alone.
This is a picture of Walter Black, a hopelessly depressed individual. Somewhere inside him is a man who fell in love. Who started a family. Who ran a successful company. That man has gone missing. No matter what he's tried, and he's tried everything, Walter can't seem to bring him back. It's as if he's died, but hasn't had the good sense to take his body with him. So mostly what he does is sleep.
It make me related alot to my thinking and open the door to depression .
Yap . I know how he feels . But my depression is into his kind ,self destruct till one would cut off thier hand . I know it hurts when the whole world said ," He is mad ." He is clooney"
The sound track is nice . I like the quotes the :
Walter Black: People seem to love a train wreck when it's not happening to them.
Walter Black: Starting over isn't crazy. Crazy is being miserable and walking around half asleep, numb, day after day after day. Crazy is pretending to be happy. Pretending that the way things are is the way they have to be for the rest of your bleeding life.
\
Walter Black: We reach a point where, in order to go on, we have to wipe the slate clean. We start to see ourselves as a box that we're trapped inside and no matter how we try and escape, self help, therapy, drugs, we just sink further and further down. The only way to truly break out of the box is to get rid of it all together... I mean, you built it in the first place. If the people around you are breaking your spirit, who needs them? Your wife who pretends to love you, your son who can't even stand you. I mean, put them out of their misery. Starting over isn't crazy. Crazy is being miserable and walking around half asleep, numb, day after day after day. Crazy is pretending to be happy. Pretending that the way things are is the way they have to be for the rest of your bleeding life. All the potential, hope, all that joy, feeling, all that passion that life has sucked out of you. Reach out, grab a hold of it and snatch it back from that bloodsucking rabble.
I'm not okay, not at all, the truth is, I'm missing something. The thing I loved the most, the face I wish were in the front row right now, the brother I'll never get back. So what do I do with that? What do any of us do? Besides lie. This is what I believe, right now, in this auditorium, there is someone who is with you, someone who is willing to pick you up, dust you off, kiss you, forgive you, put up with you, wait for you, carry you, love you. So while everything may not be okay, one thing I know is true, you do not have to be alone.
This is a picture of Walter Black, a hopelessly depressed individual. Somewhere inside him is a man who fell in love. Who started a family. Who ran a successful company. That man has gone missing. No matter what he's tried, and he's tried everything, Walter can't seem to bring him back. It's as if he's died, but hasn't had the good sense to take his body with him. So mostly what he does is sleep.
Saying Goodbye to yesterday .
I wanted to help out my cousin to do his website .But part of me is very angry that he didnt invited me to his new born baby( my nephew) . So who cares anyway ? but I thinking of doing something useful . Doctor told me . Hold on ...U will be forever down . U will be up . When is it?When shall that day come?
I had been plagued . I am happy to see Yoda ,yet I am fearful for falling for him . At times I am very afraid my consious will disappear . I thinking of messaging him hello ..Good morning . Have a good day ahead .>big kiss kiss..Then I think I would draw boundaries..Coz after all ...we all know where we stand.....I dont know what to do .
I complete my marathon .And there will sense of achievement .But after it was just pure aches . I walk with a Blade runner . I think he is good and feel with enderance even his blading legs are hurting him .And i realised...even he lost his legs , he didnt lost his spirit . But what am I doing? Why had i lost my spirit so .......easiler...
So a few more days ..I take the cup of wine and sings .. Auild lang syne ...
confused ...lost ...disturbed distress.....
I had been plagued . I am happy to see Yoda ,yet I am fearful for falling for him . At times I am very afraid my consious will disappear . I thinking of messaging him hello ..Good morning . Have a good day ahead .>big kiss kiss..Then I think I would draw boundaries..Coz after all ...we all know where we stand.....I dont know what to do .
I complete my marathon .And there will sense of achievement .But after it was just pure aches . I walk with a Blade runner . I think he is good and feel with enderance even his blading legs are hurting him .And i realised...even he lost his legs , he didnt lost his spirit . But what am I doing? Why had i lost my spirit so .......easiler...
So a few more days ..I take the cup of wine and sings .. Auild lang syne ...
confused ...lost ...disturbed distress.....
Thursday, December 1, 2011
SPYAIR - Samurai Heart (Some Like It Hot!!!)
Written by MOMIKEN
Composed by UZ(SPYAIR)
Arranged and Performed by SPYAIR
View Kanji
Composed by UZ(SPYAIR)
Arranged and Performed by SPYAIR
View Kanji
New Feature! In kanji view, mouseover a kanji character for lookup information!
Original / Romaji Lyrics | English Translation |
---|---|
dokka ue no sora de sappari kiite naindarou? wazato kobosu SAIN minogasu kimi hora itsudatte onaji de wakariatteru ...tonda kanchigai da yo koko ni iru boku ni kizukenaindarou | Somewhere above the sky you didn't listen at all, did you? You purposely overlook the sign that came to you. See, we always understand each other perfectly... What a huge misunderstanding. You don't even notice me standing right here, do you? |
hitogomi ni magirete hitori munashiku tte miageru sora todokanai kaiwa KACCHI BOORU kodoku wa mashiteku | Mixed in the crowd all alone I gaze at the sky without a purpose. With this conversation game of catchball that won't reach My loneliness grows. |
Hey!! Hey!! kotaete dareka imasenka? zutto sagashite mo kotae nai ya Hey!! Hey!! boku dake ga boku wo tsukuru kara naitatte, waratte nikundatte aishite ikite yukou Hey! Hey! SAMURAI HAATO (some like it hot) | Hey!! Hey!! Answer me. Is there anybody there? No matter how much I search, there's no answer back. Hey!! Hey!! Only I will make myself, so Even if I cry, even if I smile, even if I hate, I'll live my life with love. Hey! Hey! Samurai Heart (Some like it hot) |
nopperi toshita Day by Day mattaku kyou mo onaji darou? tokekomenai hito ni narenai machi Ah hitonami ni tachidomari kurikaeri tashikameta ashiato mae yori honno sukoshi wa aruketeru kamo | I've lived my life expressionless, Day by Day, and today is no different, is it? This is a town where you can't not fit in. Ah, standing in the waves of people, I make sure of those repeating foot steps And then I feel that maybe I can walk a bit more than before. |
surechigatta machi no GARASU ni samishige ni utsutta jibun mukatsukunda sonna jibun mo mukanshin na sekai mo | In the glass of the town I passed through My lonely self reflected back Along with my irritated self And the indifferent world. |
Hey!! Hey!! kotaete dareka imasenka? zutto sagashite mo kotae nai ya Hey!! Hey!! boku dake ga boku o tsukuru nara "Dou datte ii" nante omowanai de hontou no koe wo... | Hey!! Hey!! Answer me. Is there anybody there? No matter how much I search, there's no answer back. Hey!! Hey!! If only I will make myself Then the true voice inside of me that doesn't think "Whatever" goes... |
Hey!! Hey!! hitori ja ikirenai daro? HAATO sutete made tokekomenai Hey!! Hey!! akirameru riyuu wa iranai kimi datte funbatte kono machi de ikiteikunda | Hey!! Hey!! You can't live alone, can you? If you throw away even your heart, you'll never fit in. Hey!! Hey!! You don't need a reason to give up Because even you can stand frim and live in this town. |
Hey!! Hey!! kotaete dareka imasenka? zutto sagashite mo kotae nai kara Hey!! Hey!! boku dake ga boku wo tsukurunda naitatte, waratte nikundatte aishite ikite yukou Hey!! Hey!! SAMURAI HAATO (some like it hot) | Hey!! Hey!! Answer me. Is there anybody there? No matter how much I search, there's no answer back. Hey!! Hey!! Only I will make myself, so Even if I cry, even if I smile, even if I hate, I'll live my life with love. Hey! Hey! Samurai Heart (Some like it hot) |
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